12:23 p.m. - Sunday, Apr. 19, 2009
I bombed korea every night, I didn't know if i would live or die, I bombed korea every night
and do I sit here at this bar, I'm not a hero, I'm not a moive star, i've got my bear, I've got my stores to tell, but they wouldn't tell you what it's like in hell...
So i've got a interview/questionair with the boarder paorol on may seventh. that's a day i was planing on being out of state. but i will fogive that to have some chance of getting out of here. out of a life which so closely resembes my owen presonal vesrion of hell. a life in which i have to live with my parents just because it's so much cheaper than living anywhere else, and it's not a nice life, I have to have jugs handy just in case it rains, cause my pops is to fucking cheap to replace our roof which is leaking big time. (note, it's not in my top floor rooms that i need then buckets, it's in the basmet, yeah they are for eveything that make it past the two floors above)
and in my application for the boarder parol, I was thinking, If I can make it up 23 storys, I'm in plenty good shape to join up. but it came to me on friday, I got off early, cause of the snow. I chose to go down the stairs rather than wait for the elevator. not so much because of my fear of elevators, but because of my fear of dieing amounst a group of people. when i die i want it to be just me. I do not want to die in any group of poeple. i want to be the only one dead. hence my fear of planes and eveators and large groups of people in general.
so anyway, I got of at 3pm on friday, and I'm still sore from going down the stairs.
god I suck.
NP: cake, I bombed korea
