12:24 a.m. - Monday, Mar. 12, 2007
the highway may be strewn with sin, but it's proven it self again and again, it's the only way i'm saved
ok so i think i've figured out my problem with women.
I don't want to fuck them all.
i mean it's not like i wouldn't if they were all avaible to me, but i don't want to.
heres the scoop: www.laddertheory.com
and the thing is, even if all of the women i've known, both as just friends and on a more "presonal" level were to just offer themselves up to me, i'm pretty damm sure i wouldn't pick the most attractive of them.
i mean no, there is no way i would fuck katie, if i had any other opions open to me.
katie was this girl i went out with a while back, her dad was loaded (a former senator, and a scam artist acording to her) but she was very beautiful, classically so, just a little over wieght by modern standards, a little skinny by my own, long blond hair, albaster skin, just like a fiftes movie star... and compealy nuts, just like a fiftes movie star:)
and to tell the turth, i think i've i'd have picked the girl who i'd most like to be with, it would be one who i didn't really know all that well, like one of the corryies, or something, a girl who i only knew prefifaly, one corry was in my self defence class with me and i gave her a ride to the mall one time, the other was also in that same self defence class (as was my girlfriend at the time, wierd how that works out isnt it?) but she was friends with a girl who was friends with one of my friends...
but the reason i don't think i'd pick one of the girls i'v actually gotten to know is their all nuts.
i mean to start off with there was anna, she was my friend growning up, form like age five onward, and you know what? when i was like thriteen i caought her cheating at cards, we weren't playing for anything, not even keeping track of who won or lost, and she was cheating, and poorly. when we were playing on her computer the next year, she blamed me for the spots of her computer montitor, sure some of them where mine, from my fingers, but there were a whole lot more than i could have made...
and it just got worse from there.
the one exception was erica, and i'm thinking that i either didn't know her well enough, of that we were both to young to have actually become nuts. i knew her for a week and a couple of days back before i even got my first dog, i must have been fourteen, cause the weeklong camping trip required us to be fourteen, but i must have just turned that age, cause a two months afterwards i got my dog.
i think the one person i would most like to meet today would be her, not to fuck or anything, just to say hi.
so anyway, that's what's fucked up about me today, how about you?
NP: lovers, take good care
and like him i don't expect you'll ever understand my situation, i know like him, you're heart don't break, cause he grins as he's promiseing the mess he's gonna make, as he offers you a hand shake, saying no blood on my hands today, but when he grins you see it's his teeth that are blood stained, you told me once you were complicated, but with you i never knew what to belive
